


Mundane Things

by lexicale



Category: Supernatural RPF
Genre: D/s, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-09-29
Updated: 2012-09-29
Packaged: 2017-11-15 06:12:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,637
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/524013
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lexicale/pseuds/lexicale
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's the one year anniversary of their "thing" and Jeff has a surprise for Jared.  The only thing is, he has to work through whatever Jared is flipping out about first.  D/s schmoop.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Mundane Things

**Author's Note:**

> Based on the prompt found [here](http://transfixeddream.livejournal.com/102658.html?thread=2629890#t2629890).

It was about paying attention.

That was the biggest thing. Noticing the cues, noticing the changes. Noticing when something was wrong. Jeff had always been good with the details.

It wasn't as if his attention was required, though: Jared had never been subtle.

He came in, tall body fitting through the door with a kind of awkwardness that was more unbecoming than adorable, shoulder jarring against the wall of the narrow hallway that formed the entrance to Jeff's apartment. He didn't have a house here, and the apartment was really all he needed. He wasn't a man of extravagance. 

"Damn it," Jared murmured, shuffling in and closing the door behind him, stepping in before he paused, before he remembered, and he reached down to thumb his shoes off, not bothering to untie them when he left them by the entrance: a barely house trained puppy, most days. Jeff knew that a different man would have changed that, broken the boy into someone less loud, less messy. Someone more perfect, but infinitely less him. Jeff liked Jared just as he was, and he didn't need some doll out of a fetish magazine.

"Bad day?" the older man asked, leaning his head back against the back of the couch to look over at Jared. Jeff was seated there, having been reading before Jared got in, one ankle resting over the knee of his opposite leg, but he put his book down on the cushion next to him as he turned his attention to the other man.

"Beyond the telling of it," Jared mumbled, and moved through into the living room, around the awkward cut of the kitchen and then around the side of the couch, to stand in front of Jeff. Jared was bigger than Jeff by a few inches, and probably a couple dozen pounds of muscle, but he was probably the least intimidating person Jeff's ever met, even if Jeff were someone easily intimidated. 

"Settle," Jeff commanded, soft and easy, straightening out his legs. He patted his knee once, and he saw something spark in Jared's previously grumpy eyes, before the younger man descended, lowering himself to kneel between the table and the couch. He pressed his cheek to Jeff's knee and let out a long breath, large palm covering Jeff's kneecap, the heat seeping in through the denim. Jeff reached down, threaded his fingers through the floppy mass of hair, unkempt, and felt the pads of his fingers rub against Jared's scalp.

Jared let out a long breath, which was what Jeff was going for -- but it was shaky, which Jeff definitely _wasn't_ going for. His brow furrowed.

"What is it?"

"It's... Nothing."

"Jared," Jeff said, a little lower, a little sterner, and he clenched his hand lightly in the other man's hair. It wasn't enough to cause pain. Jeff had done pain before, with others. Enjoyed it, even. He'd always liked the sensation of control, and it came in lots of flavors. He'd had more than a few pretty subs at his feet, begging to be hurt, begging to be teased or tortured, and it'd always been Jeff's place to give it or not, to have that kind of power. Jared wasn't that kind of creature.

They'd tried it, back at the beginning, back when Jared still thought that it was all about Jeff, all about what Jeff wanted -- thought it was about biting his lip and just taking it. Jeff hadn't taken it far -- he was good with details. He knew the difference between someone enjoying their punishment and someone just getting _punished._

It wasn't that Jared couldn't take the pain. He was strong, resistant. He could take it without a grimace, take it and keep coming back for more. It was that Jared couldn't wrap his mind around the idea of punishment as play. He took it all to heart -- the idea that he'd let someone down, that he hadn't been good enough, hadn't been whatever the other person needed. He took his punishment without pleasure, blaming himself, carrying that weight around with him instead of letting it go, instead of giving over to the control of another.

Jeff wouldn't be doing his job right, if he couldn't give his sub the kind of comfort he was looking for.

So it was never about pain with Jared. Just control.

Jared's breath hitched under the gentle grasp, and then he began to relax, letting Jeff hold his head in place by his hair. After a couple of motionless seconds, Jeff relaxed his grip, returning to his petting. Jared's hair was soft, smooth -- meaning he'd actually gotten around to showering this morning. Jeff smiled a little fondly to himself, before returning to the matter at hand.

"Tell me what's wrong."

"It's not that I'm avoiding it," Jared murmured honestly. Jeff couldn't see his face, but Jared's never been great at lying. He'd hear it in the younger man's voice. "It's that I can't really... Nothing happened. I mean, it was a long day."

"And?" Jeff pushes, patient.

"And...it's been a year."

There it was. To be honest, he'd been wondering if Jared had noticed. The kid wasn't _great_ with organization or punctuality and it wouldn't have surprised Jeff if the date had just slipped right by Jared. Apparently not, though.

"I know," Jeff replied, and his hand lowered, shifting to rub against the back of Jared's neck, fingers pressing gently against the skin. He'd never had much luck at keeping a sub long term. It wasn't that he didn't love them. It was impossible not to, with that level of trust. You couldn't look at someone who trusted you that far, that deeply, and _not_ love them a bit, even if it was only for one night. It was just that it was hard to form a long term relationship based on mutual respect and equality with someone you ordered to lick your shoes. At least, it had been hard for Jeff. He'd known plenty of other Doms who'd managed it just fine. He'd thought, for the longest time, that it was just him. That he wasn't cut out for it.

Before Jared, he'd believed that. Before Jared, he'd believed he'd never go without giving out pain, giving out punishments. Now he had a man kneeling at his feet who wanted nothing more than to be kept, to be treasured. To have someone looking out for him. Jeff smiled a little to himself. Jared really was just like a puppy -- taking every punishment to heart and just wanting someone to take him home with them.

Jeff supposed he was the guy who got suckered in by the cute eyes and floppy ears.

Or hair, as the case may be.

"Did you think I'd forgotten or something?" he asked, when Jared was silent.

"No," Jared snorted a laugh, shaking his head just a little. "You never forget anything."

"So, then..."

"So...?"

"So why all this?" Jeff grumbled when he had to push himself up, off the back of the couch to lean over. He moved his hand from Jared's hair to his chin, tilting the young man's face up, looking him in the eye. "You're upset. Why?"

Jared looked up at him, his grey brown eyes flicking over Jeff's face, searching, that seeking glance of a sub looking for a cue, but Jeff didn't give him one. He wanted the truth. He glanced down at Jared's thin lips, and he brushed the pad of his thumb over them.

"...what happens now?" Jared asked, finally, voice unusually low, and Jeff's brow furrowed.

"What do you mean?" He watched Jared's long throat work, swallowing, adam's apple bobbing once, gathering up whatever it was he was carrying around in that head of his.

"I mean...what happens to us now?" Then the calm broke and Jared sat up straight, pulling away from Jeff but still looking at him, something a little like panic straightening the other man's spine. "Not that there's an 'us'. I didn't mean to use that. I didn't mean-- Fuck." Jared rolled his eyes at himself, then reached a hand up to rub at his face.

Jeff almost wanted to laugh, except he was too confused.

"The hell are you babbling about, Jared?" he asked, and Jared laughed, broad shoulders shaking up and down with it as he shook his head.

"God. I don't even know. Apparently I _am_ a crazy person..."

Jeff frowned, patience running thin, and he reached out, grabbing those shoulders in his hands.

"Jared, did you think there was some kind of timer counting down? Do I turn into a pumpkin after a year? What is this?"

"That's the question." Jared's expression turned serious. "What _is_ this?"

Jeff didn't like the way that made something in his gut twist. Sure, he'd had his plans, and he'd obviously had some kind of hopeful outcome with those plans, but he hadn't expected to feel this attached. He didn't like the sensation -- being out of control.

He let go of Jared, leaning back against the couch.

Jared was quiet for a moment, the two of them still, Jeff sitting on the couch and Jared still kneeling on the floor. Jeff didn't say anything. Jared finally did.

"You know my last two... You know it didn't work out great." Jared shrugged a little, and that was an understatement. It wasn't like there had been abuse, but Jared wasn't great at asking for what he needed, and that encouraged people to take more from him than he was necessarily willing to give. Jared had had two other Doms before Jeff, both short term affairs, the first mostly uncomfortable, and the second Jared had fallen for the guy when the guy had always said that it would be a short term thing.

It wouldn't have been so bad if Jared didn't take everything to heart to an almost infuriating degree.

"Anyways, I just--... Me and you. We were never...clear." Jared looked down at the carpet, but his voice remained steady. He picked at some carpet fluff. "And it just seems like, you know, a year is...a good time to be clear. It's just... It's a good time."

A good time to figure out if they were wasting time.

Jeff didn't glance behind him, didn't look at the plastic bag tossed next to the set of bookshelves. 

"Do you want to leave?" he asked, keeping his voice even. He didn't want Jared to go, that he was certain of. But there was no way he was giving that away. Not because of a point of pride or something ridiculous like that, but because he was responsible. It was too easy for a sub to give into their Dom's needs and wishes, even subconsciously, and Jeff always knew to be careful in moments like these. He needed to know Jared's honest feelings on the matter. 

He could tell Jared was nervous though, having no indicators of what Jeff wanted. It wasn't that Jeff enjoyed leaving him hanging. Jeff just needed to know that whatever Jared said next, it wasn't influenced by Jeff's tone of voice.

"I don't... _want_ to, no."

The way he said it, the way he emphasized _want_ \-- like he half expected Jeff to tell him to go. Like he was telling Jeff he'd be amiable if Jeff told him to pack his bags. Jeff reached out, bringing his hand to the side of Jared's face, feeling the soft skin of his cheek.

"I don't want you to go either," he agreed, not leaving Jared hanging for long, and he felt his sub let out a long breath. He wondered how long this had been eating at Jared, and he felt a little guilty, knowing he'd failed in some way to give his sub that reassurance. He couldn't help but quirk up one side of his mouth. "Did you think I was going to kick you to the curb?"

"No," Jared defended quickly, too quickly, then amended. "...just, couldn't help but wonder if you'd get tired of me. I mean, you said, at the beginning--"

"I know what I said," Jeff interrupted, and he shook his head. "But that was a year ago. Things change in a year."

"Jeff." Jared looked relieved and Jeff almost laughed, because it was ridiculous. _They_ were ridiculous. Jared leaned over, spreading his broad body over Jeff's thighs, hugging them, pressing his cheek against them. 

"It's alright," he comforted, even as he couldn't help but chuckle a bit, hand rubbing over Jared's shoulderblades. "C'mon, get up. I have something to show you."

Jared's head came up fast enough that it was only luck and quick reflexes that kept Jeff from being brained. He jerked back as Jared swung up, and blinked down at the younger man.

"Wait. What? You mean, you like, planned something?" Jared asked.

"I didn't _plan_ something..."

"You planned something and you let me freak out about where our-- _thing_ is going?"

"Avoiding the word just makes you sound like a child."

"You _planned something_ and you--"

"Jared!" Jeff halted the conversation before it went any further. "Look, first of all, it's not like I was taking you ballroom dancing or something, so stop saying it like that. Secondly, I had no idea you'd cooked up some kind of scenario in your head where I was just going to dump you with no provocation. So just..." He held up a hand and made a lowering gesture. "Tone it down."

Jared looked suitably sheepish, and he mumbled something that sounded like 'yes, master'. They used to have some kind of rule about that -- about when Jared called him that and when Jared could call him Jeff. Somehow, a year later, Jeff couldn't even remember the rule, and Jared switched back and forth depending on where they were emotionally. They used to have a lot of rules, Jeff recalled. Sometimes, Jeff wondered what happened to all of them.

"This was going to be more of a _production,_ you understand," Jeff mumbled as he got to his feet, feeling more than a little anti-climactic as he walked around the couch and over to the wall, picking up the plastic bag. It seemed like it should be a production. Instead, Jeff just pulled out the collar and did a little dance with the tag that was still attached, eventually yanking it off. It seemed so much more mundane and pedestrian than Jeff had always imagined. Not that he'd often imagined collaring a sub, but when he did, when he heard about it from other Doms waxing poetic and banal at him about their ceremonies...well. It had always just seemed like it should be a production.

Not a guy standing there with a shopping receipt in one hand. 

He glanced over at Jared, about to explain, but his sub was perfectly still in a way that months of effort had never managed to achieve. His eyes were fixed on the collar, and for a second, Jeff wondered if Jared was breathing.

It was just a _thing._ An item. Something purchased for $26.99 at a store twelve miles away from his apartment. It didn't have any fancy engravings or heartfelt endearments. It was just a band of dark leather, simple and plain, with a small bronze plate at the front and a clasp at the back. Nothing fancy. 

It was just a thing, of no particular importance materially, and yet Jared was sitting so absolutely motionless, so transfixed, and the sight was making something pinch in Jeff's breathing. It was ridiculous. Ridiculous to get this wound up over a _thing._

"You don't _have_ to--" he started, but never managed to finish. Jared had gone from motionless to in motion in that same second, scrambling to his feet and rushing over only to drop to his knees again, this time in front of Jeff, head tilted up and neck presented. Jeff swallowed, throat feeling inexplicably dry. "Are you sure?"

Jared nodded quickly, two little jerks of his head.

"I know it should be more of a-- That there should be more to this. Not just... you know."

"Don't care, Jeff. Master. Please." Each word was clipped, concise. There was a confidence there, the thing that made Jared stand out from all the other subs Jeff had ever worked with -- more than just trust and affection between them, but an understanding that Jared had desires outside of Jeff's, even if he was bad at expressing them, bad at asking. Jared wasn't a puppet or a toy, wasn't just a submissive body playing into a kinky role. Jared wanted control, wanted an owner, but he came with his own needs and thoughts; he was his own person, one that Jeff felt a certain honor to have at his feet. Someone who reminded Jeff, always, that the submission was willful and not just a given.

It humbled Jeff in a way that few things did, these days.

It was with that in mind that he leaned down, pulling the collar around his sub's neck, hearing the quiet breath that Jared sucked in, feeling the quiver of tense muscles under his fingers as he determined the right tightness. He fixed the clasp on a rung that left the collar snug but not constrictive, sitting perfect and handsome around Jared's not insubstantial neck.

Jeff straightened himself out, standing up fully again, and he looked down. Kneeling on the carpet before him was a young, powerful man, one who could probably take Jeff in a fight, but who chose, instead, to bow his head. Who was choosing to wear Jeff's collar, and that thought had never been attractive to Jeff before. It had never been something he'd particularly wanted, until he had it, and he felt a strange swell of emotion in his chest, reaching out to run his hands through Jared's hair.

Jared's smiled, wide and heartbreaking, that complete and utter trust in his eyes -- an expression of joy that caught Jeff completely off guard.

"Damn..." he murmured, taken in by that smile, and he yanked Jared forward by his hair, pressing his sub's face against the cut of his hips, against his jeans. Jared hummed, rubbing his face against the denim, his hands still in his lap as Jeff caressed Jared's head, the two of them just sitting in that position that couldn't be called anything but intimate, Jared's eyes mostly closed and his expression at peace, his nose next to Jeff's half hard cock, and Jeff felt no urge to hurry.

His hand moved up and down over the landscape of Jared's skull, fingers carding through hair and running over the back of his neck. After a minute, Jared shifted his head, nuzzling into the center of Jeff's pelvis, nose pushed against the stiff zipper to press against Jeff's erection. Jeff felt his lips quirk up, cock filling out more in his jeans. He didn't say anything, didn't feel the need to interrupt this with words, just moved his hands to undo the button and zipper, reaching in to pull himself out, giving one absent stroke. Jared glanced up briefly, a quick and silent question in his eyes and Jeff nodded his permission.

Jared smiled, turning his attention back to Jeff's cock, reaching up with one hand to run over it, moving the loose skin over the rigid flesh, fingers moving with a familiarity bred over a year of intimacy. When Jared took Jeff in his mouth, spread his lips wide around the flesh and sucked him down, Jeff felt his own breathing stutter. He curled his hands around Jared's ears, palms pressing to the point of his jaw, then caressed back, touching Jared's hair, his cheek; thumb pressing over the thin skin under which he could feel his own cock moving, Jared moving his head back and forth, bobbing up and down with the kind of singular devotion that the kid so rarely managed to find outside of their sessions.

It barely felt like sex. It didn't _feel_ sexual when Jeff came down the throat wearing his collar. It felt like some kind a ceremony -- a fucked up kind of ceremony, not really the kind he'd invite his friends and family to attend, but a ceremony nonetheless, and Jared stayed on his knees, kept Jeff in his mouth as Jeff's cock softened. He stayed there, still, warm blasts of air from his nose hitting the base of Jeff's dick, until Jeff pulled back, slipped out from those lips and turned Jared's head up, tracing the line of his jaw.

Eventually, he tapped Jared's chin and let go to tuck himself back into his pants, doing them up.

"C'mon," he murmured, voice sounding rough and warm even to his own ears. 

He started to move, to pull away, to go to the kitchen to get dinner, when Jared moved. Jeff was forced to stop when he felt Jared shift, felt his sub's arms come around his leg, holding on -- clinging. He felt Jared press his cheek against his denim covered thigh and breathe out and Jeff softened, couldn't help but.

"S'alright." His voice came out even lower, even more hushed, and he wondered what the hell this kid was doing to him. He held Jared's head in place, cupped the base of his skull and pressed the younger man to him. "You're alright."

Jared didn't say anything in response, but Jeff felt him shift, felt him almost shyly move closer, a knee on either side of Jeff's foot. Under the edges of Jeff's fingertips he could feel the ridge of the collar. He smiled, lips tugging up despite himself.

"It's alright now."

And for the first time since Jared walked in the door that evening, Jeff felt him relax under the press of Jeff's hands.


End file.
